Ging's Big Day

It was a bright sunny funny face happy face or how ever the hitman reborn opening went. Ging was sitting on his bean bag chair sipping a caprisun.

“I hate this weather”, he said. “But not as much as I hate my kid!”. The audience began to boo, but Ging didn’t care because he left the studio by this point. He walked over to the Mcdonalds to buy a 10 piece chicken nugget and a small fry and a sweet tea. A young girl in a wheelchair was taking too long to decide on her order, so Ging decided to do the unlikely, something the utmost biggest dick would do, he put on his burger king crown.

“I AM GING FREECS, AND I LIKE TO HAVE IT MY WAY!” He yelled, decking the girl in the face; causing her to spiral head-first into the concrete wall. She did not survive. He demanded that his chicken nuggets were served fresh and that he received bumberton sauce for each individual nugget. He also farted loudly.

“I’ll give it to you fresh alright, WITH MY DYING WILL!” Said Sawada Tsunayoshi, an employee at the local McDonalds. Suddenly, an infant showed up and shot Ging in the forehead with an ACTUAL bullet!

Ging arrived at the gates of heaven after satan kicked him out of hell. They sent him back to earth for being too much of a dick.

“Good, I didn’t like that place”, he said. “Then again, I hate everything.”

Being dissatisfied with dying, Ging went to NGL to go check on his drug smuggling ring.

“So Ging, we finished making the pill you wanna a taste?” The druggies handed him a pill.

“SURE!” Said Ging, kicking over a crate of them.

Suddenly, 10lbs of solid viagra was ingested into his stomach! GING HAD A RAGING HARD ON, IT HAD TO HAVE BEEN AT LEAST 1 INCH IN TOTAL!

“DAMN I NEED TO GET RID OF THIS!” Said Ging calling Kite on the phone.

“Um, sorry can’t put on the wig anymore because I’m an actual girl now.” Said Kite.

“Dude. Don’t be a fag.” Said Ging hanging up and searching his phone for more hoes to abuse.

After 5-hours of rigorous searching, he finally found the contact he had been looking for!

“OH HELL YEAH!” Said Ging. “HISOKA!”

And so, without any hesitation, Ging proceeded to skadoo into the telephone; arriving at Hisoka’s Hotel!

“HELLO?” Shouted Ging. He looked around the hotel lobby to see the rotting corpse of Illumi who had a skateboard lodged in his skull.

Hisoka who just got done sobbing in the corner and wiping the semen and cake off himself looked at Ging’s rolly polly olly and laughed. “Wow it’s so tiny! It’s like a little pizza pocket!”

Ging began to do something he had never done before...he began to cry. Not because Hisoka had made fun of him either...No. This was something deeper. He felt the emotion well up inside him, because it was at this very moment that he had finally come to a stunning realization…

“WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE, I NEVER GOT MY FUCKING NUGGIES!” He yelled with tears rolling down his cheeks.

He leaped out of the building, crashing through the ceiling. While the One Punch Man opening played, he rushed towards the Mcdonalds. In one single punch, he destroyed the establishment, killing more people.

“So uh, did I hear my the- OH NO! NO NO NO NO NO! FUCK NO! I’m staying out of this one.” Said Saitama, walking out of the fanfic.

“It’s okay,” Said Dillon Mitzvah. “Let him go…”

“Yeah, I think it’s best he doesn’t show up in this one.” Said Read Walter.

So Ging just realized something. He dropped to the ground with tears flowing down his face, he broke down and cried.

“No..! NO! I KILLED THEM! I KILLED ALL THE CHICKEN NUGGIES!!” But just then, a green creature walked up to him. It was the green goblin from spiderman.

...Specifically, it was the Green Goblin from the 2001 movie. You know the one, it starred Toby Mcguire? Yeah, needless to say, his outfit still looks really cheap by today’s standards.

“WE MEET AGAIN, SPIDAMAN!” He yelled, like a fuck.

“I’m not Spiderman, I’m Ging. Ging Freeccs. Ging Freeccs you up!” Said Ging, stabbing the Green Goblin over and over with his swiss army knife. He looked up to see a crowd of cosplayers. He was near a convention. He killed someone roleplaying.

“Oh...shit.” Said Ging. He then planted the knife on the cosplayer’s corpse and fled from the scene in his “middle finger” helicopter. The helicopter lost control after Ging took a piss on the controls and killed the pilot for farting. The helicopter headed at a face pace towards the local orphanage. It missed the orphanage by a long shot and landed in the cancer ward of the children's hospital.

“Damn!” Ging screamed. “...I was aiming for Gon’s room.”

Thankfully, Ging remembered that he always carries a bazooka in his trousers for just such an occasion! He aimed at Gon’s house and blew it to smithereens.

“Huh, Gon’s bike wasn’t there. I guess Mito and oldbitch are dead now. Haha can’t wait to see the look on Gon’s face!” Said Ging.

It was then that Son Goku, strongest of all Saiyans, showed up to stop the Ging menace!

“I’m Son Goku, strongest of all Saiyans, and I’m here to stop you, the Ging menace.” He said.

Ging then looked at Goku. “Huh, I could probably die. You could kill me easily… but you know what would kill you?” Ging pulled out a jar. He smashed the jar over Goku’s head. Goku passed out and he dragged his body to the lake.

“OH WAIT!” GING YELLED! “I forgot to ask him where the dragon balls are...DAMNIT!”

Conveniently, this was no ordinary Goku, it was GINYU Goku! So Ging stole the scouter he was wearing, but not before taking a shit on him. But it was no ordinary shit, it was diarrhea. But Ging noticed something shiny in the ground, it was a penny. A little boy in crutches walked towards it. Ging let him have the nickel, but not before giving him a get well soon card.

The get well soon card had the words “God hates crips. You’re nature's clowns. Thanks for the laugh! Love, not your parents because I killed em’!” written in it.

The kid began to cry, so Ging threw him at a nearby mountain. It was a new record; 346 mph!

“TOUCHDOWN!” Said Ging, which was incorrect, but everyone was afraid to correct him.

Suddenly, a girl with pink hair and a smile walked up to Ging. But turns out Ging left so we never found out who this girl was. She went home to shove a doflamingo figurine up her ass.

“...Today was an okay day.” Ging wrote, thus ending his diary entry.

Love, me...Ging Freecs <3